Know Your Stars
by TheRestIsRustAndStardust
Summary: The cast gets tortured by the know your stars guy. Know Your Stars was on All That on Nickelodeon. I own nothing.
1. Sam

_**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars. Sam.**_

Sam sat in a chair in a dark room."Well, yeah, I just want you people to know that I'm not really as dorky as people-"

_**Sam: Sam knows all the words to "Sweet Transvestite" from Rocky Horror Picture Show.**_

"Hey, that isn't true! Now wait a minute!"

_**Sam: Sam has a secret crush on Fred.**_

Sam almost had a coronary."WHAT??! You're just making up lies about me!"

_**Sam: Sam taught Frankenstein how to do the Sweet Transvestite dance.**_

Sam was getting incredibly mad."STOP LYING!!!!!!!!!!!"

_**Now you know Sam.**_

"You get back here! I am going to kill you!


	2. Fred

_**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars. Fred.**_

Fred sat back in his folding chair."Well, you already know that I'm awesome..."

_**Fred: Fred's real parents are a moose and a grapefruit.**_

"Hey! That's a lie and you know it!"

_**Fred: Fred ate a grapefruit. It was his own mother.**_

Fred turned red."No, I didn't! Stop lying to everyone!"

_**Don't yell at me. Cannibal.**_

"My mother is NOT a grapefruit, and I wouldn't eat her if she was. You big jerk!"

_**Fred: Fred once blew up Mexico, then put it back together wrong.**_

Okay, he was going to have a stroke."I NEVER BLEW UP MEXICO!!!!!!!!!!"

_**Leave me alone, you cannibal terrorist grapefruit. Now you know Fred.**_

The boy was bouncing off the walls."You guys don't know me at all! Get back here right now!"

_**No way, cannibal terrorist.**_


	3. Joe

_**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars. Joe.**_

Joe was very nervous. He had heard things about this guy, but then again, that was just Fred and Sam. They liked to pester.

_**Joe: Joe likes to paint himself green and yell out, "I'm a lizard!"**_

"Hey! That's completely untrue!"

_**Really? Because Fred told me-**_

"Okay, it was one time on a dare! And I was really caffeine high at the time!"

_**Joe: Joe once kissed Rita behind Sam's back.**_

"YOU SHUT UP!!!!!! I DIDN'T EVER KISS RITA!!!!!!!!!!" Rita was Sam's girlfriend. The guys liked to joke that the only reason she likes him is because she's blind. She is blind.

_**Joe: Joe likes to make scary faces and make babies cry.**_

"I do NOT!!!! Where are you, you creep! I am _so_ going to kill you!"

_**Now you know Joe.**_

Joe got up and ran around, looking to harm the voice. "These guys don't know me! You're just making up lies!"


	4. Freddi

_**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars. Freddi.**_

"Well, hi, I'm so happy to be here!" Freddi was terribly nervous. She didn't do well on interviews.

_**Freddi: Freddi is the President of Uruguay. **_

Freddi's eyes darted back and forth."Well, wait a minute, that's not true!"

_**Freddi: Freddi likes to dance with a pineapple on her head.**_

She was starting to get mad."Now listen, you need to stop-"

_**Freddi: Freddi is really half robot, half squirrel and half Italian Sports Car.**_

"That's three halves. Actually, that would be pretty cool!"

_**Now you know, Freddi.**_

"Um, excuse me, but none of that is true! I am not half squirrel, _or_ the President of Uruguay! Hello? Can you hear me? Are you still there?!"


	5. Samantha

_**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars. Samantha.**_

She waved and leaned back in the folding chair."Hey, what's up?"

_**Samantha: Samantha is really from Acron, Ohio.**_

"Um, no, I was born and raised in Brooklyn."

_**Samantha: Samantha got married to a monkey on her birthday last year.**_

She looked confused."Wait, are you just making this up?"

_**Samantha: she ate Patrick Star from Spongebob.**_

"Stop it! None of this is anywhere _near_ the truth!"

_**Now you know, Samantha.**_

"No they don't, all anybody knows is a bunch of lies! I demand that you get back here and tell the truth!"

_**Here comes the bride, who ate Patrick Star!**_

"AAA!!!!!! That's right, you better get outta here or else!"


	6. Jodie

_**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars. Jodie**_

Jodie beamed at the camera. "Well, I just though my public should know the _real _me!"

_**Jodie: Jodie is really a thirty year old man named Henry Truman.**_

"That isn't true! How _dare_ you make up lies about me!" She frowned.

_**Jodie: Jodie has another head hidden under her hair.**_

"Grrr... You better stop making things up, or I'll make you sorry!"

_**Or what, your other head will bite me?**_

"I don't have two heads!", Jodie screamed.

_**Jodie: Jodie doesn't know how to spell "catfish." **_

Jodie was boiling mad."C-a-t-f-i-s-h, catfish! Are you happy now?!"

_**I'm sorry, that's wrong, Henry.**_

"AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!! My name is _not_ Henry Truman, I do _not_ have a second head, and I CAN SPELL "CATFISH"!!!!!"

_**Now you know, Jodie. Or his real name, Henry Truman.**_

"Shut up!"


	7. Mad Jack

_**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars. Mad Jack.**_

"HI MOM!!!!!!!!!! I'M ON TV!!!!!!!!!!!!"

_**Mad Jack: Mad Jack wants to join the Peace Corps. **_

"No I don't! I'm the villain, I don't _do _peace!"

_**Mad Jack: Mad Jack raises orphan baby bunnies on a candy farm.**_

"What?! That's absolutely absurd!"

_**Mad Jack: Mad Jack is completely insane.**_

He screamed."No, I am not! I am diabolically brilliant! And I am _allergic_ to bunnies, thank you very much!"

_**Now you know, Mad Jack.**_

"You'll be hearing from my lawyers, do you hear me?!"


	8. Rita

(Rita is an OC and Sam's girlfriend. She's blind, okay? Deal with it!)

_**Know your stars, know your stars, know your stars. Rita.**_

The redheaded girl smiled, facing the wrong way until part of the crew turned her around. "H-Hello. I'm new, on this show, and I just hope to be better understood."

_**Rita: Rita's hair color is bluish green.**_

"Is it? People always said I have red hair, whatever red is. I know it's a color, but-"

_**Rita: Rita pretends to be blind to get Sam's attention.**_

That statement was both shocking and horrifying to her."THAT IS COMPLETELY UNTRUE!!!!!!!!!!! YOU _LIAR_!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

_**Rita: Rita's seeing eye dog is actually a barracuda named Freud Freudsdale.**_

"That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard! Go get him, Muffin!"

_**Help, the fake blind girl is sicking her barracuda on me!**_

"You're going to wish he's a barracuda!"

_**Now you know, Rita.**_


End file.
